Sometimes I look at parents’ actions; be it my parents or my friends’ parents, & wish if someone could tell them that they’re not doing really good in that certain situation. No one can be perfect, that applies to parents too, but the thing is; most times they don’t seem to accept criticism from anyone. Even from their own parents & best friends.
So, I am writing the thoughts I get when I see some negative actions towards the daughter & the son, just in case any parent ran into it, they don’t feel direct criticism. Also, these are my real wishes & what I think I should do when I grow up & have kids, if God blessed me with the gift of having any.
Discussing problems & yelling infront of your kids:
Yelling & shouting when your kid is around, definitely is the biggest mistake a parent can make. You would not know the pain, feel the insecurity you cause to the child watching this, unless you have been through it. So, if you did go through this, close your eyes & remember how you felt when you were kid back then, witnessing arguments that might sometimes reach physical abuse. What did you think? Did you feel happy & warm?
As for parents who had a stable home, with no quarrels or disputes, growing up happily with a childhood of good memories. Don’t you think your kids have the least right to feel exactly the same? So take this for me, as a daughter, please when you have to settle something down, Go to your room, close the door & try not to louden your voice. Because trust me, the kid won’t be brought up with a good mental health & will have some trust & confidence problems.
Not showing love to your kids:
This problem is common between alot of families. Children need to always feel wanted, loved & contained. They always need a reminder of how precious they are to you as parents. In some homes, showing love, giving hugs & kisses is not always present. It’s not something you got used to give & receive. Eventually, the child will search for love somewhere else. It doesn’t have to be a trusted place; sometimes children find love in destructive things & places such as bad groups leading them to drugs & illegal acts, or political & extremist religious organizations.
Even if you are not the kind of person who is able to show their feelings, you can open a new page with your kid & get them used to mutual bringing out of feelings from the time they are born. That will also ease up things between both of you when the child reaches their teenage, will make them open to you & able to talk about their problems.
I would like to know your thoughts about this, if you’re a parent or a child. What do you think?